ISecrecy
by CleverforClever
Summary: Sequel to 'ISecretary.' Now that Freddie and Carly had a 'Creddie' night, someone decides to try and keep them apart. Meanwhile, the two are lost in the own pasts, battling pangs left by old friends. Hurt, drama and angst. Also, clowns. Or maybe not, I don't like clowns that much. Sequel now up.
1. Chapter 1

I-Secrecy

I don't own Icarly, or Victorious or Drake and Josh, or anything else obviously owned by Dan Schneider. I also do not own Phil of the Future.

7 in the morning, Carly Shay woke herself. She showered quickly, then went to her room to dress.

7:30 exactly, Carly Shay looked into the eyes of her waking daughter and asked the same question she asked every morning; "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Her daughter's latest answer terrified her, "A Benson!" There had lately been a stream of advertisements using the Benson name to identify the pinnacle of quality, and Sarah loved the idea. Carly hugged her daughter and told her to dress.

8 o'clock, Carly arrived at Overlord Towers heading straight towards the elevators. As usual, Nevel took control of the elevators and demanded they play a game. Today, they would do strip trivia.

8:10, a fully dressed Carly disembarks from the elevator and tells Nevel, in a tiger fur thong, not to get his questions from his own newspaper since she is a mandatory subscriber.

8:11 Nevel sticks his tongue out.

8:15 after four minutes of awkward silence during which both Freddie and Carly think about the night, he declares she is late, and she apologizes.

By 8:20, she is already studying her portfolio. The good thing about the homework is that she is left alone. The bad news is she must be an expert in everything Freddie has his hands in, and Overlord is just about everywhere.

At 9, Carly rose from her place in front of Freddie's desk, stretched, and headed out. She ignored his eyes roaming her form when she stretched, drinking in her curves, feasting on her skin, and piercing her mind without apology. Her heart thumped and leapt as he tried to subtly hide her retreating form behind his newspaper.

By 9:30, Carly returned to the top floor, much to Freddie's pleasure. She was much more pleasant on the eyes when happy. Her eyes are like strobe lights, flickering unsettling energy. They pretend he does not stare at her.

10:00 break for breakfast.

At 11, Nevel, stoned out of his mind, orders a preemptive strike against Waka-Take Guatemala, a small city with a population of five hundred.

By 12, the missile strike is averted, and Carly is tested so she is ready to report on the information in her portfolio.

12:15 the phone rings. Freddie informs her that she now needs to review Waka-Take rules on tribal warfare.

At 12:30, the lunch break begins.

1:30 to 1:35, Carly reviews the days agendas.

2 o'clock to 6, she does menial labor, arranging meetings, ducking advances from her creepy boss, and ducking the things he throws.

At six thirty, she gets home late, apologizes to her daughter for not being there, and they have dinner together.

At eight, they read together. She and her mother have a conversation about their day.

At nine, Carly and Sarah are both ready for bed. All thoughts of Freddie are put on hold as her daughter says, "I love you."

At nine-thirty, Carly crawls into her own bed, alone, thinking of the man she loves, and knows she has to get up tomorrow and do the same thing all over again.

Her life has become a new form of torture.

Freddie Benson was a thorn in Carly Shay's side. She loved him. It was obvious now. And that made it so much worse.


	2. Chapter 2

ISecrecy Chapter 2

Nevel was livid. Freddie looked like someone had killed his favorite pet with germ warfare.

"Did I just hear you correctly?" Nevel voiced his dislike as quickly as possible.

Carly stood still as stone. She could not back down now. She had just declared war.

"I have a right to an education," Her words came quietly but crisply, "This Company is supposed to help support me as I go back to school."

Nevel and Freddie exchanged looks. Technically, she was correct. Overlord offered its employees assistance in such matters. Nevertheless, their employees were usually too terrified to take up the offer. This was considered insubordination, but not technically…

Freddie nodded his head. He had to accept what Carly was saying. Ever since the elevator incident communication between them on a nonverbal level had increased. She was antsy, and not because of him.

_I need to do this, for Sarah, for myself, and… maybe for you too._

Nevel was less than thrilled at the prospect of helping her. He had already started yelling the second she finished. His face was quite red. He was putting on quite a show.

Freddie could practically hear her sorrow. He tried not to think too heavily on what was causing it.

_Carly… I don't want to lose you._

Nevel, in his own world, had already mooned her. Usually, this would signal the end of the debate, but, deciding this was not sufficient took it a step farther.

_Freddie, you don't have me…._Carly replied.

Nevel, pants about his ankles, thong about his knees, waddled back in with peanut butter and jelly. He smacked it onto his rear end, and started screaming, "Peanut butter jelly time, Peanut butter jelly time," At the top of his lungs. The two were lost in their silent communication.

"We'll send you to school, Carly," Freddie interrupted Nevel from adding honey to his buttocks. The shock on their faces communicated much, "When we get a decent replacement for you."  
Nevel squealed with joy. Carly maintained her position through drive, intelligence, and dogged love for her daughter. There were no women in the state her equal. The chances that she could be replaced were low.

Carly nodded, and headed to her desk to get to work.

Nevel turned on Freddie, "Once, in a drug haze, I actually made wild love to a seal."

The muted sound of vomiting in one's mouth came from Carly's desk.

Freddie just stared. Maybe Nevel was telling him this for fun.

"And that in retrospect, is more fun to me than this," No such luck.

"Carly is her own person, there's nothing to keep her out of school," The look on his partner's face told Freddie that this conversation was far from over.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Carly got her first day off in months. It was wonderful.

For the first time since she started her job, her focus was entirely on Sarah. The way she walked and talked. Currently the mother and daughter were at the Diffy's house. Sarah was playing some crazy game, and singing a song from Radio Dingo.

Fred Benson's soul, Nevel being evil, Gibby doing wet work for an immoral company…. It was the stuff of a bad dream. Sarah was ecstatic when she heard her mother would be going to school. She thought they would be going to the same one, and offered her mother a place to sit at lunch.

Carly politely declined.

School brought back memories, wonderful and terrible in their own ways. Memories of Sam specifically made her uneasy. That afternoon, Phil Diffy came over with his daughter, Kara. The two girls made believe they were on a tropical island inhabited by rude sausage.

It was pretty funny.

Carly turned to Phil, who was staring intently at his wife. His entire family was beautiful. They were so in love. Deep pangs hit Carly's heart. She could be in love too…

"So…" Phil began awkwardly, "I'm not even sure how to begin a conversation with you."

He was a nerd. There was a book on his shelf called, 'The Joy of Mathematics.' He was very much like Freddie. Keeley, his wife, walked over. She was tall, blond, and gorgeous. His eyes leapt happily when he saw her approach.

"Excuse my husband, he never learned how to talk to a pretty girl," She leaned in on her long legs and kissed his mouth while he stuttered out an apology/explanation, "So… who else does Sarah, I mean, she talks about Mr. Benson all the time…"

It was a leading question, and a very offensive one. Still, these people had looked after her daughter; they had a right to know a little bit about the Smith family. "I met my husband Dustin in college. He was an artist," this earned a smirk from Keeley, "And… we fell so deeply in love we never found our way back out. He was offered a job in San Francisco, so I dropped out of college to start a family. Dustin, well, he was an okay guy. He loved me, was fascinated by Sarah, but, I don't know how to say this," She took a sip of water, "Dustin didn't really love like most people do. His art came first. He and his art were inseparable. Yes, he'd talk to us, and we'd talk to him, but his work, his living came between us. Then, 'cause I'm such an idiot, I said something really stupid."

Keeley's eyes lit up, "Not about…" She pointed down south on her very self-conscious husband. Phil jumped out of the way of her finger, as if a laser were about to leap from it and burn his genitals.

"Whoa!" Snapped Carly, "Not like that. I said something really hurtful 'cause he wasn't really being a dad to Sarah. He liked her, but, a bond between a father and daughter is hard to define, but definitely present. This one wasn't present."

The blond nodded, her hands absently stroking through her husband's short, black hair. There were some similarities here. Phil was mathematical like Freddie, and Keeley had been quite popular in high school. Obviously, there had been some sort of secret the two had that Carly simply did not possess. It was time to drop the bomb.

"He came home one day, and he ignored us. He was a husband to me, sometimes, but not much of a daddy. I told him he wasn't her father," Carly said it drily. He was more of a guy that dropped by occasionally to see how cute Sarah was and to hit on her mother.

Phil spewed his drink everywhere, "You mean… like, what exactly?"  
"I meant that he was not welcome in our lives until he became a real man. He walked away, which proved to me that he just wasn't ready to raise a child. Okay, so, it was a horrible thing to do, but he wasn't taking care of us. I didn't know if he would come home with food for the baby or just more stuff for his art."

She sighed, confused, "Am I a horrible person?"

Phil shook his head. Nobody knew how deeply he loved his daughter. She was his joy. Kara brightened his days at the office, and the long nights Overlord sucked from him. He would do anything for her.

His wife interrupted, "You did what you could to keep your daughter alive. If Dustin wanted to stay with you, he would have fought for you."  
Carly blushed. She felt horrible about it now. At the time, she had been up for forty straight hours. There was no food in the house, and both she and her daughter had not gone anywhere in days. Dustin was coming home with food, and to relieve her for her birthday. Sarah would be with a babysitter all night. They would fall back in love, and…

Then some model, stripping off her clothes and putting the groceries on instead walked in. Carly, a sweet girl by nature practically burst from her skin in anger. Their food was going onto a model so Dustin could make a sculpture and sell it to a super-market manager. Money was tight, but the stress got to her.

She had confronted Dustin, but he was so caught up in his work, he did not pay attention to her.

He had walked out and never come back. Carly had gotten whatever job she could. She had been fortunate enough to run into old friends in San Francisco. Chris and Chris were there, making jokes as always, some of her father's old war buddies had been reassigned to a nearby base…

Carly bolted upright without disturbing the connection between the Diffys. They were doing their own form of silent communication between lovers.

Back then, she had thought she was really lucky. Old friends from high school and college had shown up at her doorstep with their arms open wide. Her father's friends were always willing to help out. Now, given her insight into the workings of Overlord, she knew that so many coincidences were likely the work of a conspiracy.

Overlord controlled massive military grants. People from her past were likely vulnerable in other ways. Freddie or Nevel had ensnared her long before she walked into 'Make it Shine' offices.

A smile grew across her face. It was time to fight back.

The Diffys had disappeared about ten minutes after talking to Carly and did not reappear until hours later looking refreshed and pleasant. As they rejoined the girls, it became obvious how they had spent their alone time.

_Well, at least somebody's getting some._ Carly thought to herself. The two cuddled into one another, completely at ease.

Kara and Sarah were wrapping up for the day. They waved good-bye to each other. Carly was excited now that she knew of someone confident to take her place. Someone neither Freddie nor Nevel could possibly object to.

The couple asked to do something like this again in a month.

Chapter Three

(See, in my ICarly stories, a second chapter, spelled out like this indicates a scene break. Okay, just go with it!)

"Victoria Vega, please tell me why I should hire you," Nevel was dry.

The girl, panting with fear and sweat, sat down. Her first ride up had been eventful. Nevel had let loose some snakes. Nevel was a snake.

Freddie had told both women they were late and ushered them in. Tori had wanted to freshen up, but Carly warned her using the executive bathroom was a bad idea.

"Uh, well, you've already hired me. I guess since you took over my company, I work for you anyways, so, yeah, you already own me," Tori was speaking nervously. Carly needed her to do better. She did her best to communicate strength and will to her replacement.

Nevel snickered at the thought of owning the Latina, "Well, let's see what I can have you do for me…"  
"Like work under me," Freddie finished. There was no amusement in his voice, "Working for me is difficult. It takes perseverance. Give me proof that I can count on you."

Tori leveled her head. Men, though they could be disgusting pigs, responded to a woman of will, "I ran my own business, though small-time, efficiently. We were an art project that kept in the black. Do you have any idea how hard that is; to deal with the many broken psyches of the art world? I can do this job and I will do this job. All you need to worry about is when to hire me."

The two men remained silent. Well, either they loved her, or she would never be heard from again.

"Miss Smith, please escort Miss Vega to the back and get her trained. I expect her ready by the end of the month."

A.N. I don't own Icarly, or Victorious. Please Read and Review.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

It was a long day. Tori, unused to Nevel acting like the worst person on the planet, burst into tears several times. Carly managed to keep her head together, train her replacement, keep up-to-date on her list of study materials, and stay on top of Freddie.

If there was one thing Tori got delight out of, it was talking about how Carly 'stayed on top' of her boss.

She liked to talk overly sweet, pretending to be a seductive secretary, "Oh," She began as they grabbed their coffee, "Mr. Benson, sir, here's your pen." With an overly weak hand, Tori dropped the writing utensil, "Whoops, let me just get that for you."

She took a confident stance, whipped her hair to look at Carly, who sat where Freddie supposedly was, and bent tightly over to show her backside. The other woman rolled her eyes as her replacement whipped up, strutted over, and sprinkled sugar onto her finger, which she then lapped up obscenely.

"Oh, Mr. Benson, sir, you look positively stressed," Tori dropped almost all pretense, showing off her body as she lay in her friend's lap. Her brown sugar hair draped across her left side, "Is there anything, anything at all I can do to help?"

Carly rolled her eyes, "Yes, show up on time. You're late."

They both burst into laughter. Tori found a seat at the executive table (which growled angrily at her, but did not aim a weapon) and fixed her friend with a twinkle in her eye.

"C'mon, Carly, Freddie's hot, and sweet. Why don't you two, y'know, play secretary and the boss sometime?" Her question was honest, but ignorant. Still, Carly did not have a girlfriend, at least since Sam died. Keeley was sweet too, but Tori could understand her predicament.

"Do you know the definition of sexual harassment?" The other girl groaned and rolled her eyes, "I'm serious, Tori, it is not about men and women, it is about who has the power. I… I would be willing if I could, to date someone. But everyone in town is terrified of being within six steps of me. And Freddie, well, he's my boss. I can't endanger my daughter's well-being for an office romance. Besides, my relationship with Freddie has long been… complicated."

The Latina nodded her head, "So… do I have to sleep with him too?"

They returned to the office to their usual greeting.

Freddie, without even looking at a watch declared, "You're late."

They rolled their eyes, "Mr. Benson, you have a meeting with the owner of Splash-Face. According to him, you might be able to censor 'Nevel Belittles a Blind Crippled Girl' video. It is important we act now."

He nodded absently. The three left the front office and headed into the personal quarters. Here, he stepped up onto a virtual display. His watch beeped, activating the computer system around him. It hummed to life. The display informed him that the clothes he was wearing were not effective for such a meeting.

"Carly, find me something suitable," He paused, "No pun intended."

Her watch beeped as her hand pressed a control panel. It lit and spun clothes past. Carly selected something she knew he would look good in, and then handed it off to Tori. Freddie shrugged out of his jacket.

The Latina was confused, "So, what are we doing?"  
The question was immediately answered as Carly reached past the seam of Freddie's pants and pulled out his shirt.

"Uh, Carly, do you want help?"  
She grasped the bottommost button, and popped it out of place. The secretary proceeded to the next one, and the one after that, slowly taking her time. Her hands ran across his abdomen and smoothed his shirt across his pectoral muscles.

Victoria chimed in again, "Maybe I should just stand here, then."

Carly slipped her hands under Freddie's collar, weaving her way down his chest, pushing the clothing away from him, then wound her way back up to his shoulders, eventually dragging her fingers across his arm muscles.

The shirt fell as silently as the man and woman remained.

Tori continued her commentary, "I think I need some water."

With the shirt out of the way, Carly then turned to his belt, which snapped away readily at her urging.

"Whoa! Uh… that's a bit uh…"

Carly ignored Tori. The technology in the belt activated, bringing the hem inside the lock like a winding snake. She popped his button open, and unzipped his pants.  
Now Tori was silent. Nevel, in his hatred of being too much like the common man, had insisted on developing a way that he would not have to put on his pants, 'one leg at a time' like everyone else. Thus, Freddie's pants collapsed when loosened, folding themselves neatly onto the pile accumulating in the Latina's hands.

"Here we are Mr. Benson sir," Carly whispered, drawing up a replacement set of pants. She went to her knees making sure the slid up nicely, unencumbered. Tori had started to fan herself. Freddie's expression was stony. No emotion was shown whatsoever. The shirt, abnormally tight, was wound about his shoulders at a decent pace.

Carly stepped back allowing her boss to look at himself in the mirror. A burgundy shirt with dark black pants made him look daring but approachable.

"Mr. Benson, sir, is there anything else I can do for you?" Carly ignored the fact that Tori did a spit take.

"I don't know…." He trailed off, leaning from side to side, "Let's try the suit next."

Carly motioned for Tori to bring out a suit, and helped her boss out of his clothing again.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Carly looked over her class list. It said 'sophomore' at the top, which angered Carly to no end. Her first year at college was good. She had been a bright student in high school, and managed to maintain that advantage in her education.

Her second year, the one in which Spencer had gotten seriously ill, saw a dramatic decrease. It had been horrible, watching him waste away. But underneath it all, he insisted Carly make good of herself; kept pushing her to get good grades. He also told her love was her master, but that was because of the medicine.

Well, now it was obvious what he meant; she meant Dustin in the second term of her second year. He was so romantic and cute. He made a statue of her, welding it into the main buildings support beam. It was eternal. She was hooked.

Love ruled Carly's thoughts from that day forward. She had technically gotten enough credits that term to qualify as a junior. Then her third year, Sam had died. Her grades were terrible. Spencer was pretty much gone by this point. He actually had them conduct a funeral while he was still alive, explaining, "It wouldn't be as good without me around."

He had been totally out of it when Sam died. No one knew quite what killed him. All that was apparent was that it changed symptoms, and attacked various systems. The doctors were baffled. But Dustin had been there the whole time.

Seeing her brother waste away, losing Sam, and with Freddie's disappearance, Carly found herself clinging to Dustin for dear life. She scolded herself for her actions.

Spencer wanted her in college, get a real degree, look past how romantic Dustin seemed and find out if he was a man or an artist.  
_I am a skunk-bag._

Carly shook her head. After clinging so desperately to her husband, she found herself hating him too. It had been her fault. It was obvious he was deeply in love with his work. He had not been a liar, just involved already. Then she left him. What was that like? For him to come home, perhaps days after his spouse left, to find an empty house, with a letter explaining her actions.

Carly shook her head. This whole time, she had assumed it was Freddie in need of redemption. To tell the truth, she had her own skeletons, things she should have confessed. But none of that mattered now. She had to take care of Sarah, teach her right. Keep Nevel from destroying everything. Get Freddie back to the side of the angels. Not go insane. Her list had grown as of late.

Her schedule was full. This college had been in serious trouble before Overlord Corporations had stepped in. Freddie had transformed it, but Nevel had twisted it.

Now there were cameras everywhere. If she so much as missed a class her boss could use it against her. The class was seated alphabetically. Carly found herself brushing back her hair, glad that her company had updated the room to be an advanced design classroom. It was built in a way that focused learning and decreased distraction. She did not even see her classmates' faces, and she would be paired with one for the semester.

"Welcome to Art in Business, a new form of class here at…"

The professor droned on as she set herself up. Yes, her watch could record everything, but using an old fashioned pen helped things sink in. By now her teacher was going through the class, pairing people by last name. She sighed. There were thousands of 'Smiths' around.

"Smith, Carly, you are paired with…" The professor paused, "Smith, Dustin."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

It was him. Her husband had been sitting right behind her and she had not noticed. Carly felt like screaming, and then she caught sight of a camera.

**_Nevel._**

It always came back to that no-good, slimy, earth crawling, nub! The pen in her hand snapped. Ink flowed freely from its confined state.

A memory of her last day at the Towers set her mind in motion.

_Nevel had a wooden paddle, and had straight-up smacked her butt. She had been so angry. He thought it was funny, and pushed a button for an elevator. _

_She shoved him down the shaft screaming._

_It had felt so good. Freddie entered the room, alarmed by what he had heard._

_"Oh, yeah, the urge to shove him down an elevator shaft never goes away," To emphasize Freddie's point, the door dinged, and his partner appeared. Nevel huffed and pushed past her, "I'm proud you made it as long as you did."_

The glorious feeling of shoving him down the hole was now overshadowed by the fact he had survived. Freddie may have accepted his presence, but Carly flipped the camera off before diving into her work.

As soon as the bell sounded, she leapt for the doors.

_No, no, no, no, no, no, no, _Carly demanded of herself, _your life is complicated enough now that you are dealing with Freddie. Down girl, bad girl, be good, and get through college._

"Carly, wait up!" He called. She stopped. A series of curse words made its way through her head as her husband caught up. He was well-dressed, obviously in a good situation. It occurred to her that she had to hear him out, and, for once, not act rashly.

He stopped in front of her, panting. He looked into her eyes, invoking that feeling of romance, of falling backwards through eternity.

"I have to get to my next class," She snapped, "And the one after that, and the one after that, and when I'm done, I'm going home to take care of Sarah."

Dustin's eyes flickered with doubt, "Just hear me out, babe. When you left… I realized I needed you, both of you. So… I went to work for this small company, I probably mentioned it to you once or twice, 'Make it Shine' remember?"

Somewhere in the back of her head it must have registered that her contact with the company may have begun before it was collected by Overlord.

"When it was bought out by Overlord, I signed up for classes. I wanted to show those skeevey pervs I was worth keeping."

She kept silent on where she was working.

"And I wanted to prove something to you too. I want to prove I can be the man you need."  
He looked so hopeful, so willing. The way the light caught his hair, Carly wished she could have captured this moment. Alarms in her head were blaring. She did not want to let him any closer. On the other hand, Nevel likely arranged things so she would be stuck with him, forever. So, it was time to play along.

"Pick her up from school tomorrow and bring her to my house," Her watch beeped his watch the information, "We'll talk later."

Carly did not bother to threaten him. If this turned out to be some sick game, she would give Freddie something to sign, and, days later, Dustin would wake up with no arms or legs in Estonia.

_I need to return to the side of the angels too…_ She thought to herself. Dustin left her alone. Whatever happened now, she could sleep with a clear conscience. Whether or not she repaired things with her husband or not was in question. On the other hand, she got to settle the score, figure out what her heart had been telling her she needed.

But right now, she wanted to be in the arms of Freddie Benson.

A.N. Hello, my readers. And, my personal favorite for Icarly, PD. I have been gone for awhile now. I'm not sorry. I had a blast. But, looking over the traffic graphs, I realized that I should hop-to with this one. You're in luck. I saw these two were really short, so I decided to upload them together. If you want to be technical, I have finished the whole thing, I just don't feel like uploading.

Okay, one detailed review, even if you're angry with me, and I'll give you... two chapters. Deal?

Hello? Is anyone there?


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The rest of her classes flew by her in a daze. Once she fixed her standing at the college, she could graduate in a year. Then real jobs, not just ones working under someone with a real job, would open up to her.

But Carly hated herself.

She hated that she had fallen in love with a man that would not be a father to Sarah, she hated that she left college for him, lived a life with him without giving Sarah everything she needed, then left him without a great reason to do so.

Every time she made a decision, it was a mistake. Even now, working under Freddie only led to more confusion. If she and Dustin worked things out, what would happen with her boss? Would a man in love retaliate? Of course, Nevel would, but that was a given.

Still, Carly knew she had to work with her husband, not fight him. It was better to see what they could work out, if anything, than live the rest of her life wondering.

The professors said almost nothing the first day that interested her.

It was with a headache that she arrived at her house. The lights were on. Sarah's laughter was clearly heard all the way to the street. It was almost too nice of a moment to spoil.

Carly waited until five minutes before bedtime, and then went in. She heard about Sarah's day, and what she had missed. Dustin was standing upright in his chair, trying desperately to look responsible. He really wanted this to work.

Once Sarah was in bed, the two had to have an adult conversation.

"So…. Now what?"

It would be easy for them to ignore what had happened, but somebody had to speak up.

Carly explained what she had been up to, and Dustin listened intently, "Babe, listen, you may have Sarah's best interests at heart, but you can't count on her coming home to an empty house every day!"

She bowed her head. As hard as it was to admit it, being a single parent was… bad. Besides feeling insufficient, as many parents feel, she had to feel insufficient by herself. And Dustin could stay in the home. He had often worked out of his house when they were together. Maybe he could take care of Sarah?

"I know. And I feel terrible about it already… I guess, I guess I need you," She murmured.

"More than you need Freddie?" His voice was accusatory. Also, since they were never divorced, she _had_ technically cheated on him. It was not as though their separation was a clean one.

"I don't need Freddie," The words came out hard but true.

A young, teenaged part of her heart screamed its frustration. _We do need Freddie_, it protested, _when will we ever learn?_ Freddie was there through it all. He created ICarly, kept it going, kept her going. Even as a boy he gave her love and support. Even now, with the chance she may use her education to leave him, she knew he supported her. But she did not want him to. Some stupid part of her wanted to give Dustin a chance, and that part was winning. Her gut told her she would regret it.

Days passed. Tuesday was the worst work day in months. Besides knowing just how long it had been since Freddie had held her in his arms, there was no way he was ignorant of Dustin's return. He was a bit hostile, really. Tori took the brunt of it, withstanding a fifteen minute lecture on the importance of knowing the exact definition of 'perpendicular'. She was almost in tears when Carly stepped in. She confronted her boss as politely as possible, knowing he was frustrated and could do nothing about it.

"She'll do better in the future. And I know you can do better," It almost sounded like she was implying Tori ought to be fired, but in truth she communicated with him through that unspoken link, _you're not mad at her, you're mad at me and you can't come out and say it._

_What can I say?_

_Exactly, if you're going to be mad, do it by yourself.  
_She let Tori know that Freddie would be drinking tonight. Nevel called a private meeting that only he, Freddie, and someone 'off the books' would be attending. Gibby walked in. He was still the secret dark hand who dealt with whatever needed to be dealt with. Seeing him was never good news. Tori, ever one for gossip, leaned into the doors.

"Alright, we're pulling you," Says Nevel, arms crossed, "Whatever has been dealt has been dealt. Kara is no longer our concern. You're needed elsewhere."

There was a pause, "Is there a problem?"

Gibby shifted almost uncomfortably, "It's just…. This is Sam's kid. I found her, alone, abused in a foster home. I brought her here, got her into a nicer house. I've watched her for years and now you expect me to just drop her.

Nevel and Freddie exchanged looks. Dark hands did not get emotionally attached. Since this was a matter of heart, Freddie took the lead.

"I know that Sam meant something to each of us, but… it's best if we let Kara be. We don't even have a 'take your daughter to work day' so I'm not tempted," If anything, this inflamed the agent more.

He stormed off.

Tori and Carly returned to the room, standing at attention. Nevel, for once, was without condescension or humor.

A.N. Yes, I received a review, so another 'chappy' is on the way. I want to thank everyone who reads this. Why do I crave reviews? Well, many reasons. Right now, I want to know where you guys see this going. As mentioned earlier, this one is considered, 'done' in my book. The conclusion works, but I'm thinking trilogy. Tell me what you think.


	8. Chapter 8

Warning! Semi-explicit content! If you are sensitive to Carly/Nevel moments, skip this chapter. It's a bit on the riske' side. Soooo... read with caution. Anyways, enjoy.

Chapter 8

Something was coming. Carly could feel it in her bones. She turned onto her house with fear in her heart, begging to hear the sounds of Sarah playing with Dustin. Silence greeted her. She took a breath.

It had been about a month now since she started college. Dustin had dropped all the classes he had enrolled in, which freed him up to spend more time with Sarah. He took real interest in her, learning about her friends and habits. It was sweet. It was also annoying.

The two would run off at night to an exhibit or just walk, and Carly, scared out of her mind, would call in favors to the United States military. Of course, Overlord Corporation made sure the military never interfered with the day to day workings of its private city. Still, the young mother let out a deep sound of relief whenever her husband and daughter walked into the door.

Sighing, Carly resigned herself to another night of fretful cowering. She went inside to start dinner. The second her hand hit the door, she sensed something was wrong. Typically, she felt like she was being watched, but that feeling went away.

Ever legal inch of the town was under surveillance by Nevel. How come he was not watching her now? The house felt a bit empty. Dustin had not cleaned up after dinner, which appeared to be mint chocolate chip ice cream. Carly almost growled in frustration. It was easy to feed a kid ice cream, but she had to deal with the cleanup. Of course he was trying hard to be a father now. That made a huge difference. And it was something Spencer would do. That did not make it okay, but it helped her work out her frustrations.  
Once the table was wiped down, she moved to the sink and washed three bowls and three spoons.

Carly paused, realizing that her maternal instincts were going off for a reason. She had to wipe down the whole table because every place but hers (totaling to three) was dirty. Three spoons plus three bowls equaled one person extra. Maybe they had made her a bowl?

Her head throbbed in confusion. So they had eaten ice cream then left? She called them both.

"Dustin! Sarah, where are you?"

Her next instinct was to call the Diffys. It clicked into place. Sarah was supposed to be hanging out with Kara today. The three bowls and three spoons made sense now. She called their house, but got no response. It occurred to her that Dustin could have just run off with Sarah. Panic filled her heart. She could trust her husband. Any violation of trust now and there would be no reconciliation. Or she could trust her instincts and find them now.

Carly wandered outside, looking for something, anything out of place. She brought up the day's activities on her watch. There was some sort of event that Overlord had no knowledge of that occurred at five, an hour before she got home. She closed her eyes.

When they opened, it was obvious who would know. Nevel knew everything.

She hit half a dozen overrides to get to the tower on time. He was upstairs doing something disgusting, of course. A crippled Nigerian girl was screaming her lungs out as he killed her pet dog. Carly burst in and demanded his attention.

For a moment, he was clueless, "Look, it's only possible to block out surveillance if you had permission. So, you, me, Freddie, and Tori are the only ones who can do it. Oh, and Gibby of course, but he isn't in town."  
Something stirred in Carly, "Where is he?!"  
Nevel looked confused, "That's private, Shay!" Still, he hit some buttons on his watch. Nothing happened. He tried the same sequence… still nothing. He got more concerned, trying to figure out what was going on. Soon, he was in full-on geek mode, sifting through information.

His eyes were zipping until they tired. He sighed up at her, "Sometimes he disappears off the grid. Big deal, Shay!"

Carly pulled her trump card, "You've had people on me since I left college!"

His eyes widened slightly, "It was… prudent that I do that."

Her teeth gritted in anger. For once, her maternal instincts asked violence of her, _throw him down a shaft_! Still, she resisted the impulse.

"What do you want, Nevel?"

His eyes lit up like they did when he first saw her, "What have I always asked of you Carly?"

She hesitated. He always wanted power, and to make her do things. She let out a disgusted huff. His eyes rolled.

"I want a kiss."

Carly leaned back, face flush. Her eyes sought anywhere but his lips.

She turned to leave. This was disgusting. How dare he ask this of her?! Before the watch could activate the elevator, she stopped. Sarah was out there.

Carly turned around. Nevel had been waited about twenty years for one kiss. It many ways, he was Freddie's opposite. In all the chaos, it was easy to forget that both of them liked her, and neither of them got her, not really. She realized suddenly, that hating Nevel was easy. He made life difficult. But hating him was just like hating a darker form of Freddie.

Carly wondered suddenly _if the two were to switch destinies, would anything really change?_

No, nothing would change. In some alternate universe, Freddie would have set up his own website, and Nevel would have created ICarly. The two were stuck doing the same things, stuck in opposition to one another. But Carly would do anything for Sarah. And when Carly Shay put her mind to something, she did it to the best of her ability. She took a deep breath for courage.

She advanced on him angrily. His eyes were a little bit fearful as he stammered out something about, 'no pecks on the cheeks' or such garbage. She ignored him. This was no longer Carly Smith, concerned mother; this was Carly Shay, boy hunter.

How many boys had she been attracted to? The number was long into the double digits. Her insides purred discontentedly. One night, they had one night with Freddie and every day since craving his attention. His hands, his lips… and much more. This was a poor substitute, an insult, really.

She straightened her nightshirt, and pajama bottoms. Carly was clearly not dressed for a make-out session. Still, she knew she was sexy. And Nevel knew it too.

Carly pushed him down into his chair and straddled him. Her knees slipped past the edges, leaving her waste flush with his as she ground into his lap. Her hands trapped his face while her head bowed, as if in prayer. Her curves pushed against him, pushing his face up to meet hers.

He could smell chocolate chip from those unobtainable lips.

Carly brought Nevel to face her, kept her eyes on his as her lips dragged against his. Her chest gently rose under his chin, bringing his attention to her vivid face.

"Pay close attention Nevel…" And with that, she kissed him with deep passion. This was no peck. Her velvet lips were just like he dreamed  
driving against his. He was lost in the taste of Perfect Carly Shay. It was like chef had prepared a cake of sweets; cherry, with cinnamon apple. Touches of mint, cream, candy canes and cocoanut.

Carly deepened the kiss, grinding against Nevel lustfully. He could feel her body shudder with the want of his touch. His right hand smoothed the contractions in her back, along her spine. His left ensnared the contractions of her stomach, begging to be satisfied. Perfect Shay was alive with sensuality. Carly's body was so soft, so warm and inviting…

She drew back, panting. Her eyes glazed with lust, "This is what Freddie gets, whenever," Kiss, "wherever he wants." She buried her lips into his, sucking him upward, displaying her wealth of want. She wanted to be touched, so badly. She needed the touch of a man.

Nevel was breathless… and crushed. He knew what his partner had, what he himself could never possess. Carly was like fire, and she would keep Freddie warm. She would only burn Nevel. Her soft hands closed tightly about his throat, "Now where's my daughter?!"

A.N. Alright, pretty much the same deal as ever; review a story, get a chapter. Stay silent, I'll move on. My thanks to those who review. I hope everyone enjoys, but if you don't let me know how I can work on my writing.

I have to read out-loud to get some of this to work.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Carly watched Gibby dig a grave. He was sweating profusely now, five feet in. He knew she was there; nobody could sneak up on him. Years of toting around bodies gave him a seventh sense. His sixth was devoted to threats.

He sighed, putting the shovel to the earth, "You're not even armed?"  
"You're a friend, Gibb."  
He exhaled deeply, and put the shovel down, "Yeah, guess I am."

He lifted himself out of the hole with exertion, and then went to his car. He returned with a canvas, graham crackers, chocolate and marshmallows. Carly looked at him with pity, "It took me awhile to sort out. You did a good job, really. I mean, even I didn't see why you started working for Nevel and Freddie at first. Nor why you tracked down Kara for them."

He looked like she had actually brought a weapon and killed him. She continued, "I guess it made me start to think about what I had missed these last seven years. I was so caught up in my own life with Dustin; I missed what everyone else was doing. It's Sam's fault, really."  
She paused here to let the pain surface in her friend, then pass.

Gibby pushed a body wrapped in a canvas into the grave. Carly paused a moment to mourn Dustin. "When Dustin came back, I was so distracted. There was something happening right underneath my nose, the same kind of problem I had back when I first started working for Overlord. Why were Freddie and Nevel working together? Why did they make a city just to house their workers? How come they kept track of me all these years? Then I realized Overlord was around before ICarly, and was there after ICarly was gone. I don't know who started what, but I am sure that you and Freddie decided to start digging into Sam's background."

He gave a non-committal grunt, and got back to work. The dirt fell onto her husband swiftly.

She continued, "I wondered at first what was going on after we all lost touch. You must have tracked down Kara and rescued her. Why would you do that? Then I remembered what Sam recorded, about being only mostly sure Freddie was the father."  
Tears were now flowing from the hardened man's face, "I realized seeing the look on your face took me back to Freddie, seeing a man love another woman that belonged to another man. So… how did this happen?"

Gibby paused here, looking up at her angrily, "You have no idea what I feel!"  
"Yes, I do, more than you will ever know. I know you tried to love Sam the same way Freddie did," She replied earnestly. Fifteen yards behind them, the campfire popped as Kara put another log on the fire, the chocolate, graham crackers and marshmallows lay forgotten beside the grave. Carly picked them up so Kara and Sarah could have s'mores. She continued, "So, you tracked down what might be your daughter, but what was your plan exactly?"  
"Didn't have one," He admitted, "I just figured I could get Kara to come if Sarah was there. Dustin… his connections to Overlord are old; almost as old as mine. I had to kill him."  
"You didn't, Gibb, I did," She sighed. It was practically true. If she had not let him back in, he would not be dead. And he had worked for Overlord, probably to keep an eye on her, and that was truly unforgivable, "Here's what we're going to do…"


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Nevel was sullen and withdrawn. He did not even bother hitting on Tori, who had shortened her skirt by two inches, and her blouse by a whole size. Freddie was listening intently.

"So… Dustin, acting on some intention to get Overlord to pay attention to him again, kidnapped your daughter. You and Gibster tracked him down, and now he's disappeared?"  
They both nodded. He rolled his eyes in frustration, then left.

Tori followed him. Freddie plopped down onto a chair. She wound her fingers into his shoulders, imitating Carly's technique poorly. She was riling him up. Freddie grimaced uncomfortably.

Tori stepped back in defeat. Freddie practically growled her away. Carly put a reassuring hand on Tori's shoulder momentarily, then stepped forward. Hands knowing his heartbeat touched his hair, stroking it. They moved to his neck, twirling there. He suppressed a giggle. Then the thumbs found a knot. They smoothed the area around it, taking in the tension, then alternated pushing and pulling. He let out a groan of release.

Freddie leaned back into Carly's soft hands, sighing. She flexed, he sighed deeper. The knot disappeared. His shoulders sagged out of relaxation.

"Freddie, I have something I want you to sign," Carly whispered.

Chapter Ten

The girls lined up with their daddies. Phil could hardly keep little Kara beside him. She was trembling with excitement. Sarah kept her calm, though. Freddie was going down the line, shaking hands, meeting the kids. Nevel was on his computer using a program to determine which child would be growing into a hottie.

He was withdrawn, but still a jerk.

Freddie came to Kara and Sarah. He knelt down gently and gave her a hug. She called him a 'nub' eliciting a gasp from her father. Freddie was fine with it though, it was such a Sam thing to do. Sarah was just so excited to meet Fred Benson.

_I know what you feel, Gibby. I know what I am, what I have done that's so wrong. I know what it's like to not see the father of your child._

Freddie looked into Sarah's eyes as she stared into his, both of themselves losing a moment.

_I know better than anyone Gibb, what it's like to have to deal with intense guilt over one night._

They connected. Sarah Hugged Freddie tighter than any stuffed animal in her room. She hung off his neck, dangling her feet girlishly from him. Their hair was an identical dark black. She sighed contentedly, lost in the strength and comfort he brought.

**_Flashback!_**

_Freddie 'The Better Son' Benson, a highly respected newcomer, was announcing that he was not wearing underwear. The party, already full-swing and full of drunk college students, cheered even louder. Someone gave him a sword. It was not a terrible idea. Just as Freddie could still program drunk, he was still a good fencer. He swung it over his head. Carly, still in college, cheered him on. After winning his first national college match, Freddie was ready to party hard. And anyone who thought to try and stop them would likely be run through._

Freddie, too, had lost himself in the moment. So much loss had affected him. It had been wonderful to see Sam's daughter. Kara was Sam's, that he knew, but she was now Phil's. But Sarah no longer had a father in her life. Freddie knew that kind of pain. He knew the kind of loss she would be experiencing right now. So maybe they could hold onto the other a little while longer.

_Freddie leapt from the table like a buccaneer. He landed in the arms of his inebriated friend. Carly screamed with delight. Something about seeing him out there, swinging his sword about, was attractive to her. They danced together; first, a catchy pop hit, and then a sex-laden rap came on, during which Carly displayed a surprising amount of knowledge of striptease. After displaying an in-depth knowledge of putting her 'marshmallows to the pole, and blow on the coals' she landed, puffing, and breathless in Freddie's arms, only for a slow jam to come on. _

Carly watched them together. Freddie had constructed an entire town to give his daughter the best possible life. And until today, the two had not even met. He let Sarah down. Freddie had work to get to. Kara and Sarah bounced up and down.

_Freddie was a bit distant now; his dancing was a bit sloppy. Carly pulled a bit of hair to make him pay attention. Sam had broken up with him, obviously, but every time she did, he felt like it was his fault. They were always conscious of the other one…_

Freddie waved good-bye, and left for his offices. Kara and Sarah had already gained control of an office, and decided to put on a little show for Phil and Carly. It was awesome.

_Carly could not stand to see him in so much pain. She took him by his hand into a closet, and let him cry himself into a drink. A bit tipsy herself, Carly lost a bit of control. It started as a kiss on his head, the kind Marissa gave him. Then his cheeks, like she used to._

Freddie was gone now. Nothing of him remained but his daughter. Even that was not broadcast to the public. His daughter and her friend were so good, Nevel stuck around to watch them. The application on his watch deactivated, but the smug look on his face was still apparent.

"Freddie just couldn't keep it tucked, could he?" He whispered in Carly's ear, "And people think I'm the sex maniac!"  
Carly gasped, her eyes wide, oh no, not Nevel, anybody but Nevel. Somehow his computer must have told him something she herself had taken nine months to figure out. Sarah was so smart, and so practical, just like her mother. Just like her father.

_That dark room stopped being cold as two friends shared a victory kiss, and so much more._

Dustin had never known Carly had cheated on him. Yes, he had been flaky, but he had not been so bad that they were not technically separated.  
_You're not her father!_

Carly let a tear drop. Freddie could not find out, ever. She had to work for him, penance for her sins. She had to get up tomorrow morning at six and pay for cheating on her boyfriend every day by facing the man she loved, the father of her child, and not feel love in return. She had to go day to day, working as a single mother, alone, because of what she did. Cheaters never prosper. In this case, a cheater had to remain alone, and miserable, for the rest of her life.

But at least she could return every night and have Sarah. And at six in the morning, that was certainly enough.

A.N. (Exciting theme plays) Well, I hope you enjoyed. Let's get a few things out of the way, the final chapter first. If you recall from 'ISecretary', Freddie was a fencer in college. The scene described follows one of his wins. I kind of had it in mind when I referenced it in the last story, but then the whole, 'we both have significant others' came into play.

So there's that. Then I realized it was perfect. Seddie is all about conflict. They'd get together only to break back apart. As for Carly, she's not the cheating type, but she is the healing kind. When Freddie is in such deep pain, and drunk... Well, I mean that she always makes mistakes. Carly had Freddie, but lost him. I think that the writers have made her a bit crazy for boys. Every time I tune into an episode she seems to be discussing a boy.

I clearly am no teenaged girl, but it seems obsessive. So I went with it. In college, she falls for the wrong guy because the right one is with her best friend. Then tons of stuff happens behind her back.

I decided I'd leave paternity tests out of it. It makes the whole thing a mess. For Freddie, Kara symbolizes what he always wanted with Sam, but could never have. The same goes for Sarah for Carly. If Freddie knew he was Sarah's, but not Kara's, father, would he switch? It's a disgusting thought.

See, Carly realizes with Phil and Keeley that they have the secret to getting together she and Freddie don't. Freddie sees it as the secret that he never had with Sam. In this world, he isn't supposed to be with Sam, that's the secret. As for Gibby, I wanted to explain how he got into the business. With guilt (like Carly's) over screwing Sam pouring out him, he too has unfinished business. That's why he tracked down Kara for Freddie, and has been keeping an eye on her.

Now, let's get to the real question; why don't I just kill off Nevel? My version of him is a jerk, and I hope you agree that he's compelling. I love this guy. He's the devil. He turns a knight in shining armor into a shell of his former self, turns a loveable boy into an underhanded killer, and torments Carly for her indiscretions.

So why should I kill him off? What has he done that's so wrong?

Give me three reviews, and I'll write another one. This next story being the end, and I'll kill Nevel. Deal?


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